Violet Palmer, 33, and Dee Kantner, 37, have just made sports history. They became the first women to referee in the National Basketball Association. Some people wondered if they would be tough enough to face NBA hotheads like Charles Barkley and Dennis Rodman. Palmer, who refereed her first game October 31 in Vancouver, Canada, says that "confrontation is a part of being a referee." The female refs might even improve players' courtside manners. Says Blue Edwards of the Vancouver Grizzlies: "You don't want to say whatever to a lady. You want to be polite."